These days are hot...

...and I don't like it.

I hate West Texas summer days. It's hot. I don't do well in heat. Amazingly, I've lived in Texas since the age of seven, but my body functions/thinks it still lives in Maine and/or New York. Summers kill me. I do not enjoy. I would be more than happy to have 75 degree days year round. Easily. I sweat. All day. I don't like sweating all day.

I don't like the heat.

How many days until winter?

thanks

Never Can Say Goodbye

So... This will be my last blog about Michael Jackson for awhile. I promise. But, I couldn't let this day, the day of his memorial in LA, pass without saying a few fleeing words about the legendary Michael Jackson.

I scheduled my day brilliantly so that I would be in my office just in time for the memorial. Early this morning, I made my routine stops around various physician clinics. Skillfully, I might add. By 1130A, I was in line at Chick-fil-a to grab a salad, and then head to the office. Perfect.

The memorial was a great tribute and goodbye with several great speakers who shared personal special moments. My favorites were Magic Johnson and the beautiful Brooke Shields. Magic told a story about sharing a bucket of KFC chicken with Michael during their first encounter, which probably rose their stock considerably; while Brooke was very moved and saddened as she provided a glimpse of a Michael Jackson very few people saw. She even joked about the sequin glove. Very touching. Some of the sadder moments included a song by his brother Jermaine and another by Usher whose music career, like many others, was highly influenced by Michael Jackson. The real punch in the face was the final speaker of the day. Michael's daughter stood at the microphone and broke into tears after praising her father for being a great dad. Wow... Really, amazing tribute all-around. I'm just happy it didn't get all wacky with zoo animals and stuff. Seriously, you never know. Meanwhile back at the office, my friend Veronica and I paid our final respects by doing an impromptu moonwalk in the main lobby of our office building. No shame; it was for Michael, and it was much needed. With each thrust of my foot to heel, I felt the sadness slow dissipate. But, what about the pain and sorrow of others?

His death occurred on Thursday, June 25th, and I have yet to tell our 3 year old Harper that there will be no sequel to the Thriller video she's watched almost every day over the past 2 years. How do we tell these things to children? There is much difficulty for me discussing such matters. Very uneasy. Even watching Bambi days prior, I explained away the gunshots when Bambi's mother did not reappear in the forest as fireworks---"Um, yeah, she stayed behind to watch the fireworks. Bambi didn't want to watch. So...." On the drive home from daycare this afternoon, Thriller was playing. Immediately, Harper yelled 'Michael Jackson' with a big smile as she mimicked the zombie dance moves in her car seat. At that time I should have ever so subtly said, "Well, guess who else may be a zombie? That's right, Michael Jackson; he's dead. Ice cream?" I couldn't. My moonwalk eased the pain, but admittedly I am still too raw.

Barry Gordan called Michael the greatest entertainer of all time. I never really thought about it, but I agree. Considering I've known him and his music since the time I could walk, I too will bestow that moniker upon thee Michael Jackson---the GREATEST ENTERTAINER OF ALL-TIME. Now, don't think I am one of those psychotic fans, mind you. As I explained in an earlier blog, I never listened the popular music, but Michael's stuff was always there. I remember when I was, like, 7 or 8 years old, my mom told me about a dream she had. In it, I had this huge afro and girls fell madly in love with me. She often kept me hidden until one day girls spotted and chased me away. I was lost. I think, she said she found me hiding behind a car or something later. Never have I had a huge afro. I mean, I've had a "baby" 'fro of sorts, but never anything huge. She said I looked like Michael Jackson---but it was me (ya know how dreams get all crazy - someone looks likes someone else but you know they are who you think they are). So, some of my earliest memories of Michael Jackson are my mom's dream, and of course listening to those old 45's of the Jackson 5. Good times.

Anyways, I am babbling a bit here, but I bid you farewell, Mr. Greatest Entertainer of All-Time. The memories are forever with us, as your music, so this will not be my last blog. Darn, right? I mean, I still need to blog about how I break the news to Harper and our family Thriller dance rehearsals in years to come.

Shamone.

Chick-fil-a, you win again.

You win.

So... Driving around looking for a place to grab some lunch to take back to the office this afternoon. Something healthy, so the obvious choices McD's, Burger King, and Wendy's I've ruled out years and years ago. Thankfully, I've turned in a new leaf in my lifestyle back in 200-something. But, man, I do love fries....but, I digress, as I normally do here. Anyways, I drove from one of my physician clinics past Chick-fil-a. Yum! Chick-fil-a does have some of the best on-the-go salads ever! Unfortunately, it's a little past noon. Maybe a minute or two past noon. What does that mean in Chick-fil-a words: If you want a meal handed to you through the drive-thru window, make certain you have at least a half tank of fuel.

Seriously, why are there always so many people lined up at Chick-fil-a? Yes, the food is that delicious, but sweet fancy Moses! It is amazing. Our Chick-fil-a always has some poor minimum wage kid dressed in a cow costume dancing in front of the restaurant. Well, I would just like to say this to the people of Chick-fil-a: Stop with the advertising. You win. Game over. It's over.

There is truly no longer a need for the company of Chick-fil-a to advertise. No need. Save your money on developing more chicken products and more stores. You win. Advertising is unnecessary. We are all coming to you regardless of cute jingles on the radio, or a poor kid sweating his nuggets off with wearing that cow costume on a hot West Texas afternoon. Seriously, you win. Over.

Admittedly, I drove past Chick-fil-a this afternoon, but that only intensifies my desire for a Chargilled Garden Salad. More than likely, I will try again hours from now. May even get there around 1130-ish. Amazing, lunch is two meals away, and my body is already preparing. Chick-fil-a, seriously, you win.

Marked: Blue Dot Mystery Part ii

One sign of getting older is the excitement one gets purchasing new yard equipment. Definitely a sure sign. Ridiculous. Last week, I bought a brand new lawn mower from Sears. Craftsman, baby. No doubt, the neighbors are happy since the yard had become much of an eyesore during my time off tending to a new baby.

Today, I finally got to use my new Craftsman. First project was the alley. As you may recall from a previous post, there was some question about gang activity and blue dots from our neighborhood alley. You may also recall I had some reservations about said gang activity. [at this point, I'd grumble under my voice "Bullsh*t" like adolescent kids do in class] Hence, I conducted my own investigation on foot while cleaning my part of the alley. This is my conclusion:

Indeed, there is gang activity. A number of the fences have been marked with the blue dot, including mine. Pulling out my magnifying glass, I was able to determine the blue marking was made by an individual not accustomed to graffiti work. Perhaps a new gang member or a very hurried gang member from the mass number of dots up and down the alley. Also, I determined my dot was directly above our water manhole, as I later discovered all of the others. With this said, I theorize the intention of the gang maybe to infiltrate our home by means of our water lines. Interesting. One problem, however, underneath the manhole lies only the main water turn off. There is no pipe leading beneath our home or even under the fence line. Again, I theorize, perhaps the gang plans to shut off our water line forcing us to vacate the house for water, and then at that point in time gain access to our house and steal everything inside. Amazing tactic.

To conclude, this gang is highly organized. They mark fences with a "blue" dot to indicate water main shutoff. This gang has operated for years. They are all over the United States and are funded by everyday citizens like me and you. Some call them the "City"; others call them the "Water Man". Whatever you do, keep all doors and windows locked. Who knows when this mass plot will occur.

So, there you have it. Just as I thought, nothing. I saw the college boys outside while mowing the front lawn. Part of me wanted to say something. Maybe poke fun or laugh, but I couldn't. I couldn't do that. Why?? Because in a couple weeks after they've had another aggravating party with that loud laughing demon friend of theirs, simply out of spite I plan to break into their home and steal everything.

Seen one, Seen 'em all

The annual Fourth on Broadway Parade went down yesterday. We loaded up the Pilot and started our 4th of July festivities by attending. Question: Is it just me, or is every parade basically the same parade but scheduled on different parts of the calendar? Within fifteen minutes, I was done with the Forth of Broadway Parade. In fact, the only entertainment keeping my interest was a lady in front of us begging the paraders for candy. Lady, why? Leave the candy for the kids. Another question: Is is just me, or in every hometown parade are there people in the parade who appear to have affiliation whatsoever with the parade? Ever so often, random people would walk past. Half the time not even waving. Almost as if forced by the local authorities---"Either pick up litter, or walk in the parade." Yesterday's parade went on quite awhile before we decided to leave. Still, it is always a fun way to kick off the 4th of July; and, yes, we will do it again next year. Hopefully, not forced to participate due to court ruling.

Hope everyone had a fun and safe 4th of July!