These shoes are made for walking...

Tuesday during my routine visit to Best Buy for the week's recent releases, I spotted these high heels in the parking lot. Normally I do not play the part of a pervert by aiming my cell phone camera to capture images but this was different: Not because I was attracted or enjoyed her legs---so far from the case. This woman obviously strapped on those high heels for the first time that Tuesday morning.

Stolling from her car to the entrance door, she stumbled and buckled like Bambi the first time he and Thumper discovered the frozen pond. My ankle instantly began swelling with every agonizing step delivered towards the entry way. She was probably mid-40s and six foot. The balancing act however made her appear ten feet tall and age 12. I was astonished to say the least.

In conclusion, high heels are a wonderful addition to an outfit only if a balancing pole is not required.

I am uncertain what became of Miss High Heels following this photo. While exiting however I do recall an overhead announcement---"Clean up toppled display cases on aisle 9...10, 11,12."

Hmmm...I wonder if her name was 'Bambi'?

Christmas in April

Today is April 26th.  This is my good friend Jeff.  This is Jeff's Christmas tree.  This is Jeff taking down his Christmas tree on April 26th.

Congrats on your new house, Jeff.

Move Over Nyquil

Today I made another great discovery in modern medicine---Aleve Cold & Sinus.

Suffering from the joys of West Texas seasonal allergies, I may have found my new best friend for this upcoming summer. I took a tablet an hour ago. All the snot and pressure is completely gone.

Now...if medical researchers can combine both NyQuil and Aleve, there would be no pain and suffering in the world. Get with it scientist people!

Remember when Barbie was a big deal?

Last week, I watched a movie called "Lars and the Real Girl".  Great flick starring Ryan Gosling.  If you haven't seen or heard of it, check it.  Very interesting concept.  Basically, it is the story of a man who has a serious relationship with a RealDoll, treating "her" like an actual person and his companion.  Now, I'd forgotten about RealDolls over the years.  I'd initially heard about them through HBO's "Real Sex".  Reading that sentence, if you didn't know what a RealDoll was, well, you have a pretty good idea now; and you're seriously thinking about renting "Lars and the Real Girl" this weekend.  

Real Dolls are state-of-the-art life-size dolls with durable, poseable skeleton and silicon flesh designed to recreate the female form.  Clients have the dolls created to their personal specifications and desires.  Extremely creepy.  

But it gets creepier.  Check this out:

People never cease to amaze me.

Expired

This photo was taken Sunday, April 20, 2008.

More about this later.

Paid Service

Curbside peddlers and transients I do not fully trust.  

I wonder if money donated will be used for good, like a decent two dollar meal; or, if the money will go towards drugs, alcohol or even pornography.  For the latter reason, I no longer hand out money.  But I feel bad.  

The solution: When approached for money, I request the individual perform a five minute dance routine or magic trick.  Now, I am paying for a service.  

Any money earned is no longer a concern of mine and I've taught someone a very important lesson.

Shakin' Those Haters Off

I feel like I have the flu.

Yesterday some bug hit me around 3PM. My stomach knotted; I had
chills; and my body was drained. I put my head down on my desk. Two
hours later I was at home in bed. Exhausted.

I hate being sick. Especially in spring or summer. Especially when it
feels like the flu. Especially when it forces me to bed early.

NyQuil is greatness. I am convinced if taken in its earliest stages, I
am almost certain, NyQuil could probably halt the AIDs virus. Maybe
Magic Johnson took it. Any time I feel any symptoms of ill trouble, my
immediate reaction is to grab the NyQuil. Last night was no different.
Today the chills and aches have subsided. I'm just tired. Ughhh...

Thanks, NyQuil!

Tonight I plan to spend another evening in bed. I feel much better.
Plus nothing beats a NyQuil dream. Gives me something to blog about.
Speaking of, why did one of my friends Scott Lewis turn into Neil
Patrick Harris in last night's dreams?

sent from patrick's iPhone